As I write this, at the tail end of May 2020, Covid-19 lock down measures are easing here in London and we are now encountering new unknowns & new uncertainties. Positive momentum, yet another round of newly new normals. This stuff doesn’t always feel easy. Nor is it one size fits all.
There are as many experiences as there are people, all of them unique, all of them precious, valid & valuable.
Yet there are universals too….like self-awareness & being open to adjusting our perspective being our BFFs during any & all times of transition. I have been practicing them like a Mo-Fo! Keeping it simple with some essential timeless & practical wisdom.
So here’s a little list of 6 essential wisdom tidbits to support the inner-you, your mindset, heart-set & perspectives during this time of layered change. They are common sense practices that can have uncommon & boundless effects on our holistic wellbeing.
Practice presence. Do whatever you are doing with full attention. Care for yourself in the now, answer emails in the now, cook in the now, have conversations in the now. Give your activities your full attention, life flows in an entirely different way when we do this. For many of us, our minds have an unchecked undisciplined habit of spending most of their day on the future or in the past. This absolutely sucks for our mood and mental health. (Meditation is an antidote.) Yes, we may need to think ahead a bit, but we do not need to ruminate about future unknowns. And as for the creativity, adaptabilty and innovation that we need right now from everyone, it does not come from future-tripping, it is here in the now. Simply by being present and open to what is now you can dramatically improve mood & mental health. Get the Meditation Masterclass if you don’t have a regular meditation practice, it’s a game changer.
While you are present, practice appreciation. Appreciation, gratitude lists – these are much, much easier to do when we are not future tripping or ruminating about the past. Right here, right now there are squillions of things to be grateful for, squillions of things to take pleasure in. Keep the pathways to pleasure OPEN. It’s not ‘wrong’ or ‘unserious’ of you to pleasure seek and pleasure appreciate at a time like this. Right now call to mind three things in this moment that you appreciate. See, it’s easy and it feels good. Keep doing that, open up that part of your mind & heart. Appreciate. Tell others how much you appreciate them. Savour your food, flowers, birdsong, music, your clothes, your breath…
Say NO to comparison & judgement. If you are present to what is and practicing a bit of appreciation you will be less likely to look at a different person, place or time and judge whether it lesser or better. Judging isn’t our job. It is a massive energy leak and I want you to be centred, strong & present, not depleted. Comparing the old normal to the new normal(s) and arriving at place where one is better than the other leaves out the lessons, flow and precious nuances & texture of life. As well, when we focus on what ‘ought to be’ or ‘should have been’ we close down possibility, adaptability, sensitivity & creativity. Let your journey be your your journey. You don’t need to ‘come out of lock down’ exactly like your neighbour, friend, family member or whats-her-face on instagram. You do you.
Go a bit deeper. When you have a quiet moment, take a few breaths and reflect on what you are learning. Be open to lessons and be open to the fact that we are all imperfect yet totally enough & worthy at the same time. Perspectives may have shifted, new recipes may have emerged, relationships may have evolved or been tested, new rhythms, more sleep, a veg patch, a new tech skill. What are the lessons? What has brought you joy & empowerment? What did the opposite? Where did you surprise yourself? How can this inform your choices in this moment? How might you give yourself some kudos? What are you proud of?
Get good at asking clearly for the help or support you need. This is probably the least easy for most people. We often wait until it’s too late to ask for help and rather than inviting someone into a process in a polite way, we rashly bark because we are already overwhelmed. If you aren’t good at asking for help, speak to your nearest and dearest about it, at a time when you are calm and centred. Not about blame, but about moving forward, the specific ways you need support or collaboration and how you might best ask when the time comes. As well, if you need to talk things through with a therapist or just take more time to read quietly or journal or meditate don’t hesitate to seek what you need and place firm boundaries around it. Also ~ people love helping other people, make it easier for them to help you.
Finally, let it flow. Ease and grace, my friend, ease and grace. Nothing leaks energy like control freaking. Once we realise and accept how little control we actually have, burdens lift. Right now we are collectively having to dive a bit deeper into our reserves of resilience and as we do this, like any exploration, we find out new things about ourselves. Some of it will be lovely, some of it less so – and that’s OK. You weren’t called here on earth to be perfect. It’s safe to be peaceful during a transitional time. Be present, observe, choose & act in alignment with your heart & mind, repeat…
Wishing you love & strength & adaptability & joy in the process,
Podcast on Pivotal Moments and Transformative Change. Risk, burn-out, releasing control & thriving during intense change.
Blog on Why Our Soul Loves Change But Our Ego Freakin’ Hates It ~ perspective shifter on transition
Meditation Masterclass ~ online self-study in your own time, a holistic and heart centred approach to becoming a daily meditator